Dragon Age features "controversial" gay sex

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I wanna see you strut, Adam

My co-worker described to me Lambert's performance at last night's AMA (which I had not seen because...well, I am miserably uninformed I guess), mentioning his nails, make-up, and hair.  And, most importantly, that he kissed a man on stage.  My immediate and unquenchable response was "OMG, and I missed it??"

Now, I must interject a moment with a little personal info on myself: I identify as a straight woman.  That being said, I still find it extremely attractive when two men kiss (hell, if straight men find two women kissing hot, why can't I with the opposite?).  And I'm not shy about it.  In fact, I often blurt this out at any remote mention of homosexuality.  In a way I suppose I'm trying to help fight the heteronormative notions of sexuality, especially those concerning how the public views celebrities.  I mean, it's pretty damn shitty that straight people can be affectionate in public, but we expect homosexual people to keep it out of our sight.  How the hell is that fair?  But at the same time I recognize that I'm objectifying gay men in a way that straight men have objectified lesbians into a straight male fantasy.

At any rate, my co-worker reacted in much the same way as most people do when I divulge this bit of information (to date, the only exceptions I have known were the awesome friends I made in college--you all know who you are), and she said "You like that?"  She then went on "I don't mind that he's gay, but I don't need to see all that."

This is nothing new.  Straight people who purportedly have nothing against homosexuality--provided that they don't have to look at them being gay and whatnot--have been saying just that, and similar "I don't hate gay people but..." followed by "I don't want to have to look at it / they better not hit on me / etc." and other similar bigotries.  And I do think that they think they're not homophobic--heck, some of them love out and proud celebrities.  But I also think that the lack of self-examination regarding their own discomfort when confronted with homosexual people (specifically gay men) being unabashedly sexual with the people they're attracted to is quite evident of a heteronormative culture.  Yet rather than question this discomfort, we're more content to pressure homosexual men and women into not being "too gay" so us straights don't feel all icky.  Or something.

My co-worker also mentioned Adam Lambert's album cover, and his make-up, saying that she wished "he'd tone it down."  She said that it seems like after American Idol, he's just gotten more gay (I know I know--she's pretty damn ignorant, but she's willing to listen to my lectures, and she just inspired a post for me.  And what she's saying is not exclusive to just her, but our culture as well).  Which sort of ignores the fact that straight men have been wearing make-up long before Adam came to gay it up (ugh, I am so sorry I just had to type that), and also is presumptuous given that there are plenty of gay men that don't wear make-up.

I pointed out to her that Adam was pressured to keep his sexuality hushed while he was still a contestant on AI, and it's only now that his season (yes, his, damn it!) is over is he able to be the performer he wants to be.  And I find it pretty damn offensive that in the year 2009 we applaud a gay man for having such immense talent, and applaud straight male performers for objectifying women on stage, or being highly sexual with women on stage as if they're nothing more than props, but when we see the same gay man being sexual with anything but the prescripted woman, the homophobia comes out.

So, fellow straight people: you can't say you support gay rights, or gay people in general, or that you don't hate gay people, and simultaneously cite your own disgust as reason for them to not engage in sexual behavior befitting the sexuality in which they identify.  Get the fuck over it.

No one loses their damn mind as we're constantly bombarded with images of straight sexuality.  Open any magazine and you see ads, articles, an array of images that reinforce a heterosexual norm.  Heterosexual relationships are constantly viewed as standard, and anything else is deviant.  If we were to view Adam's very same performance and replace all male dancers with women, these people wouldn't even be complaining.

But I suppose there's something that straight people find threatening in Adam that they've not had to face before: not only is Adam Lambert gay, but his lyrics lack the ambiguity straight people might feel safer listening to.  We know the "you" in his songs is not a woman.  And any "body" that Adam sings about desiring isn't going to be that of a woman.  Hell, "Fever" begins "There he goes, My baby walks so slow," giving a definitive gender to his sung love-interests.  And as his album gets more attention, it will only be a matter of time before we start hearing the homophobic panic about a gay man openly singing about loving other gay men (omg, the horror!).

Adam Lambert is in a sudden, strange position right now.  It really just sucks that in order for him to be himself, he's going to be criticized by uncomfortable straight people.  And he's going to be blasted by critical gay men, too.  Oh, wait, he already is.  But gay or straight, I think it's pretty shitty that anyone is asking Adam Lambert to compromise himself so the rest of us can be comfortable with him.

But maybe if he makes them all uncomfortable enough, some of them will start to question why that is.

crossposted

This is just...inspiring. And adorable

According to the caption of the above photo, "Frank Echols, right, and Bob Robinson kiss at Love Park in Philadelphia on Saturday Aug. 15, 2009, during a kiss-in organized by gay rights activists. On Saturday activists are gathering in more than 50 cities in the U.S. and Canada for the Nationwide Kiss-In a mass demonstration of public affection."

You can read more here. I am planning to post more on this soon, but I wanted to share this, since I'm all about people engaging in public affection with people they love. It's just beautiful.

Kisses for everyone!

Intolerance of Orson Scott Card

Update: I found this courtesy of Yonmei over at Feminist SF - The Blog! Apparently Mr. Card's opinions were quite the opposite more than twenty years ago, which can be found here and here.

What does one do when an author with phenomenal talent turns out to be a disgusting excuse for a human?

I was just reading my favorite feminist blog today, and was pretty much horrified by their newest thread about Orson Scott Card. I read Ender's Game years ago, I think it was actually in high school (not for class or anything, but because I had heard good things about the book) and was amazed by it. The overall sadness, the encompassing futility in war, and the corruption of the innocent blew my mind. I also read Ender's Shadow and was even more compelled to love these books, and continued with Speaker for the Dead. These novels were amazing. However, it has been some time since I read them, so maybe it was just me in my sub-educated naivety that I thought they were so amazing (please note that this is around the same time that I first read The Belgariad).

At any rate, it's disappointing to find out that one of your influences has such detestable beliefs (China Mieville, please do not fall from the pedestal on which I've placed you, I beg of you). I actually find that this is more disgusting than David Eddings' sexism. I mean, Mr. Card states

Already in several states, there are textbooks for children in the earliest grades that show "gay marriages" as normal. How long do you think it will be before such textbooks become mandatory -- and parents have no way to opt out of having their children taught from them?

And if you choose to home-school your children so they are not propagandized with the "normality" of "gay marriage," you will find more states trying to do as California is doing -- making it illegal to take your children out of the propaganda mill that our schools are rapidly becoming.

Who the hell decided that heterosexual people are normal? Probably the same assholes that decided that "white" is normal. I must say I love Mr. Card's ironic quotes around "gay marriage."

I can't believe that we're still arguing about these issues. People are people and they are attracted to who they are attracted to, and have the same human rights as everyone else. Why are we still "othering" people that don't fit the "norm" (see, I know how to use "quotes" as well, sir).

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Many of our greatest authors were disgusting beyond their work: Shakespeare (if not a homosexual, then certainly homosocial) was racist (show me a work by him that isn't...seriously, I don't believe one exists); Chaucer was a rapist (not that I like Chaucer to begin with, but at least I can point that out every time someone wants to lavish him with praise); and James Joyce was anti-Semitic. And, I will not play favorites here: Baudelaire had a touch of the racism as well, though his favorite lover was black (it's a little creepy how he fetishized her body).

I don't understand why people act as if gay people sprouted from no where. I've met people who actually think it's a decision, and that it's only "gained in popularity" in the last 20 years or so.


Yeah, because gay people didn't exist until a decade ago. Tell that to the Romans, asshole.

Oh, and if the majority got its way every damn time, I doubt we would have anything remotely resembling progress. Orson Scott Card points out that

These judges are making new law without any democratic process; in fact, their decisions are striking down laws enacted by majority vote.

Well, maybe the majority isn't always right. Civil Rights Movement, anyone?